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10 000

by Emilie Kahn

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1.
Blame 05:24
-- Lyrics -- We were both born in a godless time When I’d want nothing more than to know you’re mine We played all the right notes, but it came out all wrong But the music still plays It goes on and on and on Well I followed the signs, but I’ve learned nothing yet Now my shoulder’s weighed down from brass and regret Wishing you could undo the hurt Ain’t easy as re-buttoning your shirt Like a child you run and hide And heartlessly you change your mind Loveless far as I can see Heartlessly put the blame all on me So I packed up my love, put it back in it’s case Shoulders weighed down from pine and mistakes Wishing I could undo the hurt Ain’t easy as lifting my skirt Like a child you run and hide And heartlessly you change your mind Loveless far as I can see Heartlessly put the blame all on me Now your chops are so sore from trying to explain You don’t love me no more, well there’s no one to blame But you’re to blame
2.
Ten Thousand 04:23
-- Lyrics -- Far and wide I’ve searched for the coin in the mouth of a fish And I have found nothing yet Call on the half moon to shine its light onto your loaded heart Cause this has gotta start Wish I could woo you with ten thousand talents But all I’ve got is this fever hot Burns like the sun All the hearts that you’ve won only go so far Far as I can tell I can swim but I don’t walk on water I’d never had known if I’d never had bothered And these days I’m a little off balance Cause I’m a slave to ten thousand talents I can tell you right now that if you Do that again I will up and leave you So fast it will make your head spin Do you know all of the trouble that you’re in? Ten thousand talents that you’ll never see That’s ten thousand talents that I’ll never be
3.
Closer 03:35
-- Lyrics -- Carry me down where the sky meets the ground Where the water’s still clean, where I’ve planted your tree Been watching it grow since so long ago And ripped off the leaves while they were still green Take my head and push it under the water Take my hand; it can only bring me closer But in my heart I know what’s wrong and right I don’t have the strength and my wit is too slight But you take all I have with the bat of an eye Still I wanted so bad to make it right So we wait and we pray and count down the days Till you pack up and you move away I don’t know what’s worse; is it a gift or a curse? And which path is right? Will it be fight or flight? Take my head and push it deep as you can Take my hand; it can only bring me closer But in my heart I know what’s wrong and right I don’t have the strength and my wit is too slight But you take all I have with the bat of an eye With your cold hearted, unkind and unwilling twisted mind You think you have the right And in the middle of the night she woke Kicked me out into the street saying go home There is no room here for two lying whores But I want her so bad to know that I didn’t want her to go
4.
White Lies 04:28
-- Lyrics -- Oh his heart is bound somewhere down south So I can’t understand a word that comes out of his lying mouth I wake up to a warm room everyday So I leave the window open and now things are gonna get cold This is bound to get old Time and time again you hold it in your hand And I’m no more than a means to your end I worked my hand to the bone I whine, I bitch and moan but in the end I’m always right I know you’ve said it all along, but I can’t tell the truth from your little white lies I am just not cut out for this life Not cut out for dog fights and red eyes and drinking every night But I can play along like I can play this song for you While she’s getting you off cause you can play along too I’ll walk you through the steps, yes I will should you what to do Seen it all before, now I’ll show you the door Time and time again you hold it in your hand And I’m no more than a means to your end I worked my hand to the bone I whine, I bitch and moan but in the end I’m always right I know you’ve said it all along, but I can’t tell the truth from your little white lies Why don’t you just go on back down home? Cause me telling you off I might as well be talking on my own Cause I knew you were gone when I opened the door I knew that you were done, I knew you were no more Please don’t tell me so because I never asked you But it doesn’t surprise me, I wouldn’t put it passed you I can feel it coming, I can feel the hurt Before you even say it, before you speak the words Telling me I can’t, you’re telling me I’m wrong Why can’t we just agree, why can’t we get along Told you I’d do better, I promised I’d be good I thought you said you knew, I thought you understood Shout it from the rooftops but I don’t make a sound Not a crack in the wall, not a dent in the ground
5.
Nothing New 01:10
-- Lyrics -- I’ve got nothing new to offer you Just my body and soul And if that is not enough for you Well I think that you should go You opened me up and saw inside You don’t like what you see I apologize I’ve got nothing hiding up my sleeve You want thrills than you should leave And if you want surprises I think you’ll do Better with someone new Cause I’ve got nothing left to hide I am open, open wide So if you want back under my skin Come on in
6.
Babel 03:15
-- Lyrics -- I feel a bit scared I know that it’s wrong Spent such a long time Singing the same song You know it ain’t fair To be so unkind Keeping me waiting While you make up your mind Please, please, please don’t make me choose I used to see him come Now I just watch him go Cause even he knows I’ve been unfaithful Could spend a lifetime Untangling my lies The cruel intentions Hiding behind my eyes Please, please, please don’t do this to me Well it seems I’m stuck on this seesaw And I can’t decide which I like best Feet in the air or solid on the ground You could build a tower up to the sky I’ll knock it down and tear you all apart Cause I saved you once, I won’t save you again This time we’re gonna do it together he said Oh my god I need a friend Someone’s gotta tell me what I’m doing is wrong Cause it’s hard to say but I still believe Two lovers are better than one
7.
Long Gone 03:06
-- Lyrics -- Waiting for a sign from the good lord I refuse to be ignored Cause I need answers much more than food Waiting for the good lord to save me Drive you out to the country Yet we’re still haunted like the ship on this shore And I was terrified that the dark of the night would swallow me whole Waiting for a sign from the good lord Like the time you shaved your beard Leaving your skin naked, exposed to my whim Waiting for the good lord to save me Take you up through the trees Up on the mountain where you first saw my way And I was stupefied that my prayer had been answered right there and then Missing you was never enough Now that you’re gone
8.
Go Home 03:52
-- Lyrics -- I’ll spend the next six months drinking And I will love no one but my mother You cannot count on me Stop counting You’d better find your own way home Go home I will not be your lover I’m still in love with another I may call you up in the night Late at night But don’t let me into your home Go home I don’t love you and you definitely don’t love me I want to, but I won’t
9.
-- Lyrics -- Holding just to hold on Hoping just to have one more day But since you shined a light on All my hopes have all gone away Collecting your secrets while I sleep Tucking them away now, nice and neat Shaking life a leaf, you’re so afraid I might find out what you’re made of What happened to you? All alone and so afraid that nothing ever stays the same You can’t save a bad man Or hear what you want him to say, but you can pray But I am all done praying I’d rather watch you burn and fade away Cover up your eyes now with your hands Oh my dear, I understand What I get it never what I see But don’t trust me What happened to you? All alone and so afraid that nothing ever goes your way Still I’m a believer when you lie Though we may never see eye to eye I’ve paid my dues and I’ll be damned if I see you back here again I know what you’ve done and it’s alright Whatever gets you through the night Pushing your knife into my back Why’d you do that? What happened to you? All alone and so ashamed It’s all I seem to know these days What happened to you?
10.
Hold Me Down 04:51
-- Lyrics -- Hold me down Till all I feel is all this anger My twisted anger In a knot Untie it with your nimble fingers But still it lingers In my blood and in my bones Still can’t seem to find a home Since the day that you left me I’ll make you regret the day you met me Hold me down Till all I feel is all this anger My twisted anger In a knot Untie it with your nimble fingers Catch more flies with honey Though I’m sweet don’t be deceived My veins run with vinegar Still so bitter Still so very bitter Hold me down Till all I feel is… In a knot Untie it till it’s… When you get what’s coming to you won’t be coming back Lost in what you’re lacking, but it’s center that you lack When I get my hands around, my hands around your neck There is just no telling, you can tell her that she’s next
11.
Dream 03:48
-- Lyrics -- Oh my love I’ve been waiting for the day you come home Since you left me here alone I can see you drifting somewhere out on the sea Wonder if you can remember me While I wait here dreaming Tienes los ojos azules como el cielo en México Where all the birds are bound to go But waiting on blue skies to turn is just about as good As knocking on rotten wood Won’t keep them from leaving Only a matter of time before things come undone And I find that I’m left the only one But what does it matter if I know anything true at all? There’s not a word that could make you fall back in love again Oh I know it’s long been over and you’re never coming home I can see no end, no border to this place we roam I don’t need to up and leave to find myself as you do I’m right here; I’ve been here all along And I will stay right hear Just dreaming

about

For her LP, 10 000, Emilie wrote the lyrics and music, then fully constructed the songs with Jesse and her drummer Francis Ledoux. The record came into being upon a frigid February, in the sprawling house where Studio B-12 resides nestled in the woods of Valcourt. The 1969 dwelling by architect Jacques de Blois stands suspended in time. Sunlight pours through its enormous windows, onto the retro-futuristic furnishings of rooms too numerous to count. In this eccentric venue, succumbing to one’s vision becomes inevitable. “We went to pick up our sound-engineer, Jean-Bruno in Montreal in the middle of the night. He and Jesse got to work as soon as they arrived. It must have been one in the morning. When I woke up at eight, the two were still there, working on the same song […]. We would willingly work fifteen hours a day.” Ogden sat in the basement, the drums and other instruments were set up in various other spaces, and meters upon meters of wiring snaked across the floors of uniquely shaped rooms.

As with the Valcourt home, Emilie’s immersive universe is made up of countless rooms, dissimilar yet housed under the same roof. Here, a folk Art Nouveau ballad (Blame) beckons; there, a pop song pays tribute to the inaccessible (Ten Thousand, the deftly altered recollection of a biblical passage: “ten thousand talents that you’ll never see”); elsewhere, a musical novel dwells on end of an imaginary romance (White Lies). The musician also deconstructed and reconstructed two tracks from her previous EP, Babel and Long Gone, and added six more original songs. We enter fascinated and emerge wholly enamored, feeling as though the female voice and beguiling harp had somehow spirited us away for space of 10 000 lifetimes.

Her songs are written with a vibrant, sensitive intellect; each is a world populated by the faces of fleeting passions. The extraordinary musical quality of these finely crafted pieces stems from another brilliant mind: Jesse Mac Cormack, Emilie’s accomplice and producer since her late teens. Their collaboration began with her first self-titled EP, three tracks which emerged from a grey winter in a makeshift apartment-studio. They continued to work together, her, a studious instrumentalist and extracurricular songwriter and him, a melodic genius and whimsical arranger. This very human and subjective formula yielded the desired results ; in the months that followed, Emilie lined up performances at POP Montréal, Osheaga’s official pre-party, the Montreal Jazz Fest, MEG Montreal, NXNE, M for Montreal, Canadian Music Week, as well as support acts for the likes of Half Moon Run, Patrick Watson, Ibeyi, Tigran, Les Soeurs Boulay, Groenland, Klô Pelgag, The Franklin Electric, Folly & The Hunter, Elliot Maginot and Jimmy Hunt, to name a few.

The longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world’s existence. All these half-tones of the soul’s consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are.―Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet

It seems the young harpist, distinguishable by her brown bangs, has little in common with the 20th century Portuguese controversialist. And yet Pessoa’s words could not have more accurately described the vivid sentiment embodied in Emilie’s work, ringing especially true in the Montreal-based singer-songwriter’s first LP record, entitled 10 000. Longing, anguish and love emerge from its sound and travel through the trembling flesh of those listening.

Emilie began playing music as a child by mere chance when she was handed down a flute by a family friend. She studied the instrument up until college, without ever forming a lasting bond with it. No one could have guessed that she would one day find herself entranced by the Mesopotamian beauty of the harp. In the meantime, she lent her voice to short-lived bands and through them felt the thrill of performing to small crowds: “I went onstage a few times at the school theatre,” she recalls, “and the feeling was incredible.” Still, none of these experiences could have predicted she would one day play the strange instrument to an audience.

No—what changed the wispy brunette’s destiny was a moment seemingly of grace, as she gazed upon the magnificent harpist Sarah Pagé playing along with her school’s choir, mingled with the faint memory of a tortured chorus from the song Emily, by Joanna Newsom. “I had never felt this way toward an instrument,” she said. She found a teacher on Craigslist the next day. A few months later, Ogden entered her world in all its 38-stringed majesty. Together, they became Emilie & Ogden.


***

Emilie signe tous les textes et les compositions de son long jeu 10 000, étoffées par la suite en compagnie de Jesse et Francis Ledoux, son batteur. C’est par un mois de février polaire, dans l’immense maison qui abrite le Studio B-12, sis dans les bois profonds de Valcourt, qu’Emilie les a enfin figées dans le temps. Temps qui semble d’ailleurs s’être arrêté entre les murs de cette construction moderne de l’architecte Jacques de Blois, érigée en 1969. Le soleil y coule par des fenêtres immenses, heurtant de mille éclats les parures rétrofuturistes qui meublent les appartements si nombreux, que nul ne s’est jamais réellement attardé à les compter. Un lieu fantasque où l’on est complètement submergé par la visée à atteindre. « Nous sommes allés chercher notre ingénieur de son, Jean-Bruno, à Montréal au milieu de la nuit. Aussitôt arrivés, lui et Jesse ont commencé à travailler. Il était bien 1 h du matin. Quand je me suis levée à 8 h, ils étaient encore là, les deux, à travailler sur la même chanson. […] On travaillait quinze heures par jour, avec un plaisir immense. » Ogden au sous-sol, la batterie et les autres instruments installés dans l’aire ouverte, des mètres de filages serpentant les planchers des chambres à géométrie unique.

Comme dans la maison de Valcourt, dans le monde absorbant d’Emilie, les pièces sont innombrables, dissemblables quoique sous un même toit. Là, on croise une indélébile ballade folk-Art Nouveau (« Blame »), ici une pop-chanson-ode à l’inatteignable (« Ten Thousand», habile altération du souvenir d’un passage biblique, « ten thousand talents that you’ll never see ») —, et là encore un musico-roman fantasmant la fin d’un amour inventé (« White Lies »). De son œuvre antérieure, la musicienne a conservé deux titres, « Babel » et « Long Gone », déconstruits puis reconstruits, auxquels s’ajoutent encore six autres originales. On y entre fasciné pour en ressortir palpitant, épris, comme si cette voix féminine et cuivrée et cette harpe, désarmantes, nous avaient arrachés au réel, le temps de 10 000 vécus.


Ses chansons, des mondes peuplés de visages évoqués comme autant de souvenirs intarissables de passions vécues, Emilie les a toujours écrites avec l’encre d’un intellect affectif et vibrant. Des pièces d’orfèvre dont la musicalité extraordinaire s’est aussi jusqu’ici toujours logée dans les hémisphères cérébraux d’une autre entité, d’une moitié complice, incarnée depuis le crépuscule de l’adolescence en la personne de Jesse Mac Cormack. Collaborant depuis l’avènement d’un premier EP homonyme, trois titres nés dans la grisaille de l’hiver entre les matelas d’un appartement-studio de fortune, les deux ont travaillé ensemble : elle, instrumentiste studieuse et auteur-compositrice extrascolaire, lui, génie mélodique et arrangeur fantasque. La formule d’une science humaine subjective et opérante, qui produisit l’effet escompté ; dans les mois qui suivirent, Emilie enchaîna les prestations — à POP Montréal, au Osheaga Official Pre-Party, au Festival International de Jazz de Montréal, au MEG Montreal, au NXNE, à M pour Montréal, au CMW, puis aux côtés de Half Moon Run, Patrick Watson, Ibeyi, Tigran, Les Soeurs Boulay, Groenland, Klô Pelgag, The Franklin Electric, Folly & The Hunter, Elliot Maginot et Jimmy Hunt, notamment.

« Les sentiments qui nous font le plus souffrir, les émotions qui nous étreignent le plus douloureusement, sont aussi les plus absurdes : l’envie de choses impossibles, justement parce qu’elles sont impossibles, la nostalgie de ce qui n’a jamais été, le désir de ce qui aurait pu être, la douleur de ne pas être différent, l’insatisfaction de voir le monde exister. Tous ces demi-tons de la conscience créent en nous un paysage douloureux, un éternel soleil couchant de ce que nous sommes.
― Fernando Pessoa, Le Livre de l’Intranquilité

Certes, la jeune harpiste à la frange brune et le polémiste portugais du XXe siècle n’ont que bien peu en commun. Et pourtant. Avec une précision presque encyclopédique, les mots de Pessoa n’auraient pu mieux décrire cette émotion vive qui habite l’œuvre d’Emilie. Et plus encore ce 10 000, premier long jeu de la singer-songwriter montréalaise, où, dans les ondes acoustiques comme dans les chairs — qui immanquablement frémissent à son écoute —, naissent et meurent les désirs, les angoisses et les amours.

Musicienne depuis l’enfance, flûtiste par un de ces hasards simples et heureux — une amie de sa mère lui offrit sa flûte traversière, qu’elle fit sienne sans s’y attacher et qu’elle étudia avec ardeur jusqu’au collège —, Emilie n’aurait pu se douter que la subjuguerait un jour la beauté mésopotamienne de la harpe. Si quelques groupes éphémères avaient bien fait entendre son souffle et sa voix claire à de petites foules, lui procurant une émotion certaine — « Je suis montée quelques fois sur la scène du grand théâtre de l’école, se rappelle-t-elle, et à ce moment-là, je trouvais le sentiment incroyable. » —, rien ne la prédestinait à jouer sur scène du triangulaire instrument.

Il aura fallu un instant de presque grâce, à observer s’exécuter au fond d’une salle de classe, une magnifique harpiste prénommée Sarah Pagé — et peut-être aussi le souvenir enfoui du refrain torturé de la chanson « Emily » de Joanna Newsom — pour que se trace pour la menue brunette une tout autre destinée. « Je n’avais jamais ressenti quelque chose de semblable pour un instrument. » Le lendemain, Craigslist lui donnait un maître, et quelques mois plus tard, la rare Ogden, cette majesté harmonique à 38 cordes, devenait sienne. Et eux, Emilie & Ogden.

credits

released October 2, 2015

All songs written by Emilie Kahn

Recorded by Jean-Bruno Pinard at Studio B-12 in Valcourt, QC
Mixed by Ryan Worsley
Mastered by Ryan Morey
Produced by Jesse Mac Cormack

Artwork by Jani Clarke

Published by Secret City Publishing Inc.

2015 Secret City Records Inc.

***

Écrit et composé par Emilie Kahn

Enregistré par Jean-Bruno Pinard au Studio B-12 à Valcourt, QC
Mixé par Ryan Worsley
Masterisé par Ryan Morey
Produit par Jesse Mac Cormack

Pochette par Jani Clarke

Éditions : Secret City Publishing Inc.

2015 Secret City Records Inc.

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Emilie Kahn Montreal, Québec

Montreal harpist Emilie Kahn is releasing Outro, the lush follow up to 2015’s 10 000. Formerly known as Emilie & Ogden, Kahn’s latest is a shimmering collection of indie pop teeming with adulthood’s melancholy. Outro is a fearless pop record from an artist determined to swing for the fences. ... more

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